Today is the 5 year anniversary of the happiest day of my life. My husband and I were married on a warm May afternoon at a B&B in Reading, PA. And today I pause to reflect on lessons learned in our married life.

  1. Don't let things go until it's too late. There's lots of help out there for the asking, but what you have to do is be willing to beggar your pride and ask. People are often more than happy to help you, unless you latch onto one of those "Negative Nellie's". In that case, look harder.
  2. You don't have to have your parent's marriage. Your parents are often your strongest example of what is normal in marriage. But that doesn't mean they are normal, or even good examples. Don't be afraid to question if their version of marriage is going to work in your life. And don't be afraid to adopt another style.
  3. Know that, above anything else, the person you've committed your life to is the one who truly has your best interests at heart. They should, for if you go down, you're taking them along, right?
  4. Divorce is not an option. Period. Man up and get through and past your problems. Or, if you're the fairer sex, put on your big girl panties. There's a reason why you chose to join with your spouse...now concentrate on that reason.
  5. Be a team. Work together for the greater good of the family. And share your struggles and faults with your spouse. Often we marry a person whose strenghts are our weaknesses, so capitalize on that.
Okay, I'm all out of pearls of wisdum. But I just want to say Yasar, you are my soulmate. You are my balance, my counterpoint, and my partner. And I can't wait to grow old with you, either. Phebeck, habibi!

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