Husbands + Vacuums = Disaster!

So last night I was delivering pizzas in the snow - my husband wanted to watch the Steelers beat down the Chargers and make their next step towards playing in this year's Super Bowl. Yasar calls me, says Andrew's complaining of stomach pain, what should he do? Being the omniscient mommy that I am, I knew what was coming, and told him that Andrew is going to throw up - be ready. And I wasn't wrong.

Fast forward to today, I was vacuuming with my baby, the Dyson Animal which I love so much. My m.o. is vacuum the carpet, then change attachments and move on to the kitchen. So I'm doing the transformer-thing with the wand and hose, turning my Dyson from an upright to a canister. And I notice something weird about the hose. It's see through, all the better to locate clogs, and it's got sticky stuff in it. Lots of it. You gotta be joking....

So I call the store, where Yasar's working. I beg him to tell me that he didn't vacuum up puke with my $600 vacuum. Silence. Then, "Okay, here's what happened..."

"After Andrew threw up, I wasn't sure how to clean up the couch and carpet. So I threw some flour on it, you know, to absorb it a little. Then I vacuumed it up."

I'm dumbfounded. "You vacuumed up puke and flour with my Dyson?!?!?"

"Well, to be completely honest, I couldn't find the flour. But I figured powdered sugar would work just as well."

Ohmigod. I'm totally quiet and still, not sure whether to cry or laugh hysterically. Thank God it's a Dyson, made to be completely dismantled, just for these types of situations.

Yasar wasn't so tickled, though, when he was breaking it down and cleaning it out tonight.


  1. Poor andrew. Hope he is better now. If you read the post about my daughter you know we live in vomitville alot of the time. Hope your vaccum recovers. Next year get your husband a wet dry vac for christmas.Sometimes I wonder how man has survived.

  2. Oh Emily, gotta give him credit for clean it up, but gee...the vacuum?

  3. Oh my word. Vacuuming up puke. That is the grossest thing ever. Husbands - useless!

  4. I'm not sure how I found your blog, but I've been following it for a couple weeks now. This post made me LOL, but I was sad inside for your Dyson.

  5. Ewww..omg i think I would have had to first remove a body part from my hubby and then make him clean it...at least yours can clean it up...my hubby cant stand poop or vomit...last time our dog got sick he was standing there holding the bag for me, while I am inches from the floor trying to scoop up dog vomit with cat poo in it..yeah nasty, he drops the bad and runs to the bathroom. Hes not much help

  6. OMG! That is a Christmas dinner-table story! LOL

  7. oh emily! men just can't think through clean-up of bodily fluids! when my kids puke, it's always in their beds - so eric, being the darling, helpful husband he is, will strip and change the sheets while i clean the child. which is great, don't get me wrong, i'm thankful that he's there for that! but then he balls up the sheets (contents and all) and places them on the wash mashine. then, yours truly, after spending the night with said ill child, waking constantly to their change in breathing, will empty the contents from the sheets into the toilet and launder said sheets. hoping that the red dye from the twizzlers the child had eaten the night before will come out from the princess sheet set! at least yasar cleaned it up - that was a blessing. :) this did make me laugh out loud though! :)

  8. That is classic. I can just see him dismantling the vacuum and cleaning out the puke. Old puke. Better to just clean it up in the first place, I'd guess?!

    Hope your baby is feeling better.