Today was a really good day. After dropping Andrew off at preschool, I hooked up the mp3 player and headed out for a walk. I thought it would be a serious time of introspection, but it ended up being an all-out praise and worship session. I can't be mad at God for Leila. He has blessed us so much with her, and with everyone's love and support right now. I can't even say I'm feeling sad. It's an awesome state to be in. We are so fortunate.
We picked up Leila's ashes from the funeral home today. It's so pathetic, seeing my daughter in a cheap plastic take-out carton. But all they had were these miniature urns to put her in, and she deserves better than that. We came home and ordered a beautiful porcelain box with an angel carrying a baby engraved on it. I can't wait for it to get here so we can finally see her home, settled, and where she belongs.
This evening Andrew and I took pizzas up to the hospital's labor & delivery department to thank the nurses and staff for their amazing care while we were there. Tears were flowing all around, and both the main nurses, Nikki and Darla, were saying that they had been praying for us. These women just touched me, that they see something like this so often, and are still so impacted by it. They'll remain in my prayers for such a long time.
We're headed out tonight, going to meet with some new and very special friends. My life is so full, my cup runneth over.
Love you, Leila. Can't wait to see you again!