Generosity has been the topic in church these last few weeks.
It's a conviction that's constantly stabbing my heart. It's been a long time since we've had an income to tithe from. I hate not being able to give what I owe, especially to God.
Two weeks before Thanksgiving, God spoke to me. He asked me to believe in Him, to trust Him.
My little cheesecake venture was just getting off the ground.
So I promised Him that every penny I took in between then and the next Sunday would go into our church's harvest offering.
That was so hard. Especially when I needed ingredients to fill incoming orders and didn't really have the money to pay for them. It felt like Satan was tempting me at every turn that week.
But I kept my promise. I walked proudly and tearfully to the front of the church that next Sunday with my husband at my side, our envelope containing our widow's mite clutched in our hands.
I believed that God would bless me for my faithfulness. I believed that it would be a blessing in the form of more cheesecake orders.
And it was. The few days between Sunday and Wednesday were exhausting. I made and sold 24 cheesecakes in 4 days. I am so grateful to God for His faithfulness.
But that wasn't all. I don't necessarily believe in prosperity gospel, but God made a solid argument for it Monday.
The church secretary stopped at the store to give Yasar and I an envelope that was left for us at the church.
An anonymous envelope. Containing $500 cash.
If I could explain the thoughts and emotions that I experienced, opening that envelope. My Father cares so deeply for me. How He loves us!
I know He will carry is through this next test. The one that's no longer on the horizon. It's here.
The store is failing. Whether it's due to the economy, or the new competition moving into town, it doesn't really matter. We've had two of the worst weeks imaginable, and no resources to pull from to make it up. We need a miracle of Biblical proportions to keep the business going.
And I think about the foreclosure, and the fact that our house is up for sheriff's sale, but is not yet on the list. I wonder if this isn't God's timing. His plan. It all fits together a little too conveniently to pass it off as coincidence.
My mom told me yesterday that my dad's got an appointment with the heart specialist this week. That his PCP ran an EKG on him and must have a concern with the results. A few years ago he had a quadruple bypass, and he's an uncontrolled diabetic.
I wonder if God's not setting the stage for us to move back to Pennsylvania.
I trust Him. Whatever is coming, He's shown me in a very palpable way that He's in control.
Stepping out in faith is becoming a habit.