It doesn't take much to break me these days.
The reality of my loss is so much bigger now.
The pictures of Leila, the ones that used to comfort me, they just hurt so bad.
I WANT MY LITTLE GIRL BACK!
On an intellectual level, I know it doesn't do any good to have a tantrum.
Yet it seems to be all that I can do.
Holding her urn to my belly and curling around it, feeling my heart break.
Sobbing so hard no noise comes out.
Seeing myself in the mirror scares me.
True grief is ugly.